Browse Category: life

running on fumes

Sorry for the lack of posts this week.  I’ve been surviving work on half a tank of gas and running on fumes by the time I get home.  As soon as I’m home, it’s baby duty for me and by the time Kumquat goes to bed, I’m practically asleep in front of my laptop.

It’s been three weeks since I returned to work and each week seems to drag longer than the previous.

Kumquat has been waking up at 3 or 4 am most nights and we had one morning when she cried for 2 straight hours until my alarm went off for the morning.  That work day was NOT fun.  I’m also in the middle of a transition at work where I’m training a new hire to take my place while I’m going to be working on a different service starting next week.  I’m sure all that has contributed to this sapped feeling I had all week.

Luckily it’s Saturday morning now and I just spent an hour and a half playing with Kumquat and she actually let me sleep for 6 straight hours last night!  Aaaaah…life is good again.

Jes has been doing great as Mr. Mom.  He seems to have the routine down quite well and even makes dinner most nights!  He also managed to get both of them on Muni and BART and then my hospital shuttle so that they could meet me and the girls for Happy Hour on Thursday night.

It was really fun being out with everyone and having the husband and baby along too.  It was the best of both worlds.

Last night we also went out for a little evening outing.  After feeding Kumquat at 7, we packed her up in the stroller and walked to Super Duper for a tasty hamburger.  Afterward, we headed over to La Boulange at the mall and hung out with a bottle of wine while Kumquat slept.  We were back home by 10:30 and I had a good Friday buzz.  That was a nice way to end a rough week.

Sly Park

This weekend we met up at Sly Park Recreational Area for our annual camping trip.   Jes had already set-up the campsite on Friday with the boys and then everyone else arrived later that day. I left the house around 8:30 am on Saturday with the dog and baby in the car along with a trunk filled with camping gear.  It’s just outside of South Tahoe and it took me only about 2.5 hours to get to the campsite. It was a balmy 90 degrees by noon but the mosquitoes were under control with the help of two citronella lamps.  Kumquat and the dog did great on the drive up and Kumquat was in a really good mood the whole afternoon.

We spent the early afternoon hanging out in the shade and Kumquat seemed to enjoy her new surroundings.  We then walked over to the “beach” area to check out the “lake”.  The reason for all the quotations marks is that it was actually a dried up wetland covered in goose poop and a muddy reservoir.  Jack and Tessa seemed to enjoy the water but we chose to hang out under the canopy to enjoy the breeze and mosquito-free area.

Kumquat even managed to take a nap while we were out there.

The biggest difference in this year’s camping trip was bedtime.  Everyone was in their tents trying to get their kids to sleep by 9 pm.  We were actually the last family to settle down and it was interesting to hear the other campsites partying-it-up until midnight.

I didn’t sleep very well since I was overtired from my first week of work with a baby who wasn’t sleeping through the night.  We managed to get all three of us in the tent rather comfortably considering it was a tiny two-man tent barely big enough for the two of us and a duffel.  Kumquat slept in our portable bassinet for most of the night but at 2 am she woke up crying and her hands were freezing.  I moved her into my sleeping bag and she slept so peacefully for the rest of the night.

In the morning, I let the baby and husband sleep in while I got the dog out of the car (that’s where he slept) and took him for a good long walk.  I’m not sure if Koa actually enjoyed the trip since he had been either tied up or in the car the entire trip.

He pretty much hung out catching flies or dealing with his little stalker, Rowan.

After breakfast, we hung out and it was fun watching the kids play.  We left the campsite around 11:30 am and stopped at In N Out on our way home.  Despite Kumquat’s great mood throughout the past 24 hours, she was super grouchy once we got home and needed a lot of attention to help calm her down for the night.

Overall, I’d say that we had a successful camping trip with a 3-month-old.  I am, however, glad that it was only 24 hours long.  It was just the right amount of time that both Kumquat and I would have been able to tolerate the heat, mosquito threat, and dirt.

Here is this year’s group photo, which shows that the number of children is catching up with the number of adults. Camping is never going to be the same as it used to with our carefree days and late nights.  We probably won’t be burning as much stuff and the boys probably won’t be taking the same ridiculous number of shotgun beers.  It’s a little sad but pretty cool to see our families growing too.

Here are the photos from our past trips.  It’s pretty fun to see how the 6 of us (Ryan, Michelle, Vyl, Bang, Jes, and I) have changed and aged over the years.  It’s also been cool to see that we’ve kept up with this almost-annual camping trip for almost 10 years now.  I’ve also been able to visit some of the most beautiful places in our country.  Yellowstone is still my favorite and we have many more places left to see.

Big Sur, August 2003

Yosemite, August 2004

Emerald Bay State Park, South Lake Tahoe, August 2005

Yellowstone National Park, July 2006

Sequoia National Park, August 2007

Emerald Bay State Park, South Lake Tahoe, August 2009

Lassen National Park and ReCamp, August 2010

 

Mr. Mom goes to Tahoe.

Week 1 of Jes’ Paternity Leave is coming to an end and it started out well.  He really stepped it up and it’s made going back to work a little easier each day.  I don’t know if he has a greater appreciation of our little pipsqueak or being a caregiver but it’s great to see him so involved.  When I get home, he recounts all the blowouts she’s had, the walks that they take, and the little tantrums she’s had that day.  It’s also cute to see Kumquat give him a big smile in a way that tells me that she’s had some good quality time with him.

My mom is also here this week, which has been helpful with the transition and so that Jes could go to Tahoe today.  He went with his college buddies to see their old friend/roommate perform in his band on the big stage.

Everest is opened for Neil Young tonight and they were invited to watch from the pit and backstage. Here’s a photo of Joel being a rockstar.

By the way, they’re on a Corona commercial that was played during the Super Bowl this year.  Joel is the one on the right bouncing around with his guitar.

We’re also going on our first camping trip with Kumquat this weekend.  Everyone will be there tomorrow but since I’m working, so I’ll be driving Kumquat and Koa to the campground on Saturday morning.  It should be fun but also an interesting challenge to have a 3-month-old on this year’s trip.

Dinner and a Movie

On Tuesday, Jes and I had our first date night.  We never really went to see the movies before Kumquat was born but my mom is home to watch Kumquat and watching a movie is one of those things that you can’t really do with a 3-month-old.  For dinner, we went to Urban Tavern.  We shared French Onion Soup, Arugula Salad, Pretzel and Sausage, and Meatloaf Sliders.  All were pretty good but the big glass of wine that I had with it was even better!

We then walked to Metreon and watch The Dark Knight Rises.  Since dinner was mostly small plates, we got an order of nachos that came with two containers of jalapeno peppers.  Yum.  Paired with an Icee it was perfect for such a fun movie.

I had a great time and it was nice to go out as just the two of us again but when we got out of the movie it was nearly 11 pm and I was missing my baby girl.  I even said it aloud to Jes, which confused him a bit.  It seemed that I had a mini moment of panic and actually insisted that we take a cab home instead of walking.  I don’t know what had come over me.  Was it the fatigue catching up to me?  Was it hormones?  Maybe I’m just not aware of all the different emotions that come with this rollercoaster called Motherhood.  I guess I’ll just chalk it up to the stress of my first week back at work.

Well that kinda sucked.

Kumquat woke up hungry and crying at 4:30 am this morning so I fed her and tried to put her back to sleep.  Ten minutes later she started to cry again and Jes got up to wrap her back up and placed her next to me in bed.  It was nice.  She was all bundled up and happy and I got to snuggle her while she was wide awake.  I think I fell back asleep before she did.

At 6 am, my alarm went off and I snoozed.  When I woke up again and looked at the clock it said 7:28!  What?! That’s the time I was supposed to leave!  After scurrying into the bathroom to brush my teeth and change, I went back into the bedroom and saw Jes’ clock that said 6:34.  WUH? Apparently my clock was playing an evil trick on me.  So I had plenty of time after all.

At 6:55, I sat on the bed watching Kumquat sleep.  She looked so peaceful but I knew that I had to feed her at 7 before leaving for work.  She actually slept through the whole feeding and I was able to place her back on the bed without a single squeak from her.  When I kissed her goodbye for the day, I got a bit choked up.  However, I think having her asleep made it a little easier than if she was smiling or crying.

So I left.  I was on the Bay Bridge driving to work when my eyes started to well up in tears and I had my moment.  I was a mess but got myself back together by the time I pulled up to the parking structure at work.  When I arrived at the hospital it was a bit surreal.  Had four and a half months already gone by?  Sheesh.

After stopping at Employee Health to get my annual TB test, I walked into the gym and found a box on tissues on my desk.  Aw.  How thoughtful.  I was greeted by Teresa and Stephanie and they did their best to greet me without making me cry.  Of course I did anyway.  Those tissues sure did come in handy!  After a greasy bacon and egg sammich and some lighter conversation with my buddies, I checked in with my manager and suddenly got tearful again.  My manager actually got tearful with me too.  Aw shucks.  Once I got hand-off from the therapist that was covering for me, I was off to the races with a full caseload!

Once I got started with my day, I was feeling much better.  My mom sent me a photo of Kumquat doing her morning Tummy Time and I got updates on my BabyConnect app each time Kumquat pooped, ate, or slept.  Both were very reassuring.  Sounded like things went smoothly on Jes’ first day as Mr. Mom (with a little help from my mom).

Pumping at lunch was a little awkward but it was just me being self-conscious.  Working at a hospital is one of the best places to have to do this since 1) everyone around me is so knowledgeable/helpful, 2) we have hospital-grade pumps available for me to use, and 3) all of our past “new moms” have done this and one even gave me her “Do Not Disturb” sign to use on the door of one of our clinic rooms.

By the end of the day, I lost count of how many welcome-back hugs and greetings I received.  I was also back in the groove of things and surprised that my clinical skills had come back so quickly.  Before I left, my co-workers even congratulated me on a job well done on my first day back. I guess if I had to return to a job, this was one of the best situations I could have hoped for.

When I got home, Jes was out on a walk with Kumquat.  When they came home, I said “hello” to Kumquat and she gave me a big smile.  Aaaah…that just made my heart melt.  After showering all the hospital off of me, I got to spend the next 3 hours playing with my little lady until bedtime and it was plenty.  I guess everything is going to be just fine.  Jes will be ok, Kumquat will be ok, and I’ll be ok.

Transition

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It’s 11 pm and I can’t sleep. I’m going back to work full-time tomorrow and I’m so bummed out. This has been the best 4.5 months of my life. It has been awesome starting from the month that I had off waiting for Kumquat’s arrival, to giving birth to my baby girl, to the last 15 weeks of being home with Kumquat and watching her grow and change before my eyes. Now it’s time to hand her over to Jes who will be off for the month of August. In fact, as I’m writing this, he’s giving her the 11:00 pm bottle and putting her back to bed. I know he’ll be great and I know she will be happy but it’s heartbreaking to let go. I’m gonna be a hot mess tomorrow morning when it’s time to say goodbye. Wish me luck.